After a week of being sick and not getting to the gym, AND taking last week off - 207.1! 2.1 pounds down! That makes a total of 19.7 pounds, or 10.9 pounds since the beginning of this year. Woo hoo!!!! I'm feeling great, even though I didn't quite get to the 2.5 pounds I hoped to lose. 2 pounds is a great weekly goal, and that puts me 7.1 pounds away from reaching 200 or less by the end of March. From now to the end of March is actually 5 weeks (my week starts on Wednesday), so that should be very achievable. I'm definitely hopeful!!
Today at the gym I pushed myself to up my running intervals. I've been running 2 laps at the end of my running/walking cardio segment, but during the segment I've been running 1.5 laps. Today, I ran 3 sets of 2 laps, which is alternated between 1.5 laps. That sounds confusing! Basically I did this - 2 laps walking, 2 laps running, 2 walking, 1.5 running, 2 walking, 2 running, 2 walking, 1.5 running, 2 walking, 2 running and 2 walking. Phew!! It was definitely difficult, but I want to push myself to be able to run 5 minutes (2 laps takes me about 1.75 minutes) straight by the end of April. By the end of March I'd like to be running 3 laps intervals. Hopefully with a dedicated gym schedule this will be possible!!!
Let me take this time to say how much I believe in interval cardio training. I read a website that said interval training can burn 9 times as much fat as standard aerobic exercises!!! You can also get more energy and more of a toned look. If you notice on elliptical machines, the "weight loss" program is one variety of interval training. Anything that spikes your heart rate, and then allows your heart to recover is interval training. So I use running and walking, or on the elliptical I up the resistance level. Try to make your intervals as even as possible - 2 minutes of one, 2 minutes of the other. Or longer intervals if you want! My running and walking intervals aren't yet even, but only because I need 2 laps for my heart to recover!! I'm looking forward to getting them even, time-wise. You can check out the webiste www.intervaltraining.net for more information!
Because of all this working out, I'm exhausted! I'll write again soon. Thank you!!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Not Giving Up
Today I'm proud of not giving up. I had some hurdles to tackle this week - sickness, which made me want to eat anything to make me feel better, and not being able to go to the gym. It would have been easy to say, "oh I'm taking this week off" and just wait until I feel better to diet. But I took last week off, and I felt like I needed to get back on the horse. If I kept putting off returning to the diet routine, it would have been even harder to get back into it. So even with sickness and lack of working out, I stuck to it! And I'm actually looking forward to my weigh-in tomorrow. I'm hoping to at least lost .5 pounds, because that would put me at an even 10 pounds since the beginning of January. Ideally, I'd love to lose 2.5 pounds, which would mean I'd only have to lose 7 pounds in March to reach my goal of being under 200 by the end of the month, but any loss is a loss!
I think the biggest thing that made this week a little difficult is the lack of working out. I'm used to earning a lot of activity points (in WW, the more you work out, the more extra food points you get) that I can use to have some extra food. So, it's an adjustment when I don't have those extra points. Sure, I'm a little less hungry because I'm burning less calories, but when you're used to being able to eat something, it's a bit of a change when you can't. I'm still shocked that I missed going to the gym this week. I'm going later today, though! Finally over my cold.
In addition to not giving up this week, I'm proud of myself for not giving up on weight loss altogether. I've technically been signed up for weight watchers since October of 2008. I just couldn't stay consistent enough to really lose any weight until now. So it would have been easy for me to say, oh screw it, I'll always be fat. But I just wasn't satisfied with always being unhappy with myself. So eventually I found the motivation (and, thanks to thyroid drugs, the energy) to stick to it! And somewhat ironically, the biggest motivation to keep losing weight is seeing the results of the weight you've already lost. Seeing my clothes fit better, or wearing clothes I haven't worn in years, or hearing people compliment me about how thin I look - these things REALLY keep me motivated. The more I'm in a good mood/head space about my weight loss, the less I want to reach for those cupcakes. I talked yesterday about being a bored eater, but I'm also an emotional eater. If I'm feeling depressed, there's nothing I want more than fatty and greasy foods. Since I've been so motivated, I haven't been sad about turning down those foods. I was actually thinking about how satisfied I am with my life right now, and when I think back to how I felt about myself in just November or December, it's such a HUGE difference. It's hard to explain, but suffice it to say that my mom and stepdad have both noticed that my attitude has significantly changed for the better. Isn't it amazing the things that happen when you enjoy your life and feel good about yourself?!
I think the biggest thing that made this week a little difficult is the lack of working out. I'm used to earning a lot of activity points (in WW, the more you work out, the more extra food points you get) that I can use to have some extra food. So, it's an adjustment when I don't have those extra points. Sure, I'm a little less hungry because I'm burning less calories, but when you're used to being able to eat something, it's a bit of a change when you can't. I'm still shocked that I missed going to the gym this week. I'm going later today, though! Finally over my cold.
In addition to not giving up this week, I'm proud of myself for not giving up on weight loss altogether. I've technically been signed up for weight watchers since October of 2008. I just couldn't stay consistent enough to really lose any weight until now. So it would have been easy for me to say, oh screw it, I'll always be fat. But I just wasn't satisfied with always being unhappy with myself. So eventually I found the motivation (and, thanks to thyroid drugs, the energy) to stick to it! And somewhat ironically, the biggest motivation to keep losing weight is seeing the results of the weight you've already lost. Seeing my clothes fit better, or wearing clothes I haven't worn in years, or hearing people compliment me about how thin I look - these things REALLY keep me motivated. The more I'm in a good mood/head space about my weight loss, the less I want to reach for those cupcakes. I talked yesterday about being a bored eater, but I'm also an emotional eater. If I'm feeling depressed, there's nothing I want more than fatty and greasy foods. Since I've been so motivated, I haven't been sad about turning down those foods. I was actually thinking about how satisfied I am with my life right now, and when I think back to how I felt about myself in just November or December, it's such a HUGE difference. It's hard to explain, but suffice it to say that my mom and stepdad have both noticed that my attitude has significantly changed for the better. Isn't it amazing the things that happen when you enjoy your life and feel good about yourself?!
Monday, February 22, 2010
Bored Eating
Today I'm proud of NOT bored eating. Monday is my sleep in day - I don't have to work until 3:30. Usually I go to the gym, but I'm still not 100% over my sickness, and I didn't want to push it. I do fully intend to go tomorrow. So I woke up around 10, and just kind of vegged for most of the morning/early afternoon. Usually, I would want to munch on chips or popcorn or something, but I didn't! I had my breakfast, and 3 1/2 hours later I had lunch. The thing to do is keep busy, for me.
I have a HUGE problem with eating when I'm bored. I've found some snacks that allow me to do this, but still, anything can be bad if you're not paying attention to how much you're eating. Snacks I pull out when I know I only want to eat because I'm bored - any fruit that's eaten in pieces like grapes or oranges, 94% fat free popcorn made by Orville Redenbacher's and baked chips (still have to watch portion sizes, but they're better than regular chips). I find popcorn is the best for me - satisfies that salty craving and I get to eat a lot of it! Notice - this is not movie theater butter popcorn, it's low-fat popcorn! It still has flavor, a little salt and fake butter, and I think it's yummy.
No matter what I find to eat, I think I will struggle with bored eating my entire life. Even if I know I'm not hungry, I just have a desire to eat something. My mom used to call me out on it when I was a teenager. I think it's just part of my upbringing, or a habit that I might always have to fight. I wish I could say that I know I can break the habit, but I'm content now to say that I'm working towards decreasing the effect the habit has on my weight. I'm aware that it's a problem, and I'm eating healthier things when I have the urge. For now, that'll do.
I have a HUGE problem with eating when I'm bored. I've found some snacks that allow me to do this, but still, anything can be bad if you're not paying attention to how much you're eating. Snacks I pull out when I know I only want to eat because I'm bored - any fruit that's eaten in pieces like grapes or oranges, 94% fat free popcorn made by Orville Redenbacher's and baked chips (still have to watch portion sizes, but they're better than regular chips). I find popcorn is the best for me - satisfies that salty craving and I get to eat a lot of it! Notice - this is not movie theater butter popcorn, it's low-fat popcorn! It still has flavor, a little salt and fake butter, and I think it's yummy.
No matter what I find to eat, I think I will struggle with bored eating my entire life. Even if I know I'm not hungry, I just have a desire to eat something. My mom used to call me out on it when I was a teenager. I think it's just part of my upbringing, or a habit that I might always have to fight. I wish I could say that I know I can break the habit, but I'm content now to say that I'm working towards decreasing the effect the habit has on my weight. I'm aware that it's a problem, and I'm eating healthier things when I have the urge. For now, that'll do.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Clothes and Chubbiness
Today I'm posting 2 things I'm proud of, since I missed yesterday.
First, I'm proud that yesterday I fit into a skirt that I haven't worn in about 2 years, AND I got 2 compliments that I looked nice. I remember that I bought it in fall of 2007 to wear in one of my Vocal Jazz Forums, and I'm positive I didn't wear it any last year - so 2 years is my best guess. And bonus - it's a size 14!!! Now, I'm not completely a size 14 yet, because I tried on a pair of pants in the same size and they didn't quite button. BUT I'm definitely moving closer, because I remember trying on those same pants last year and it looked liked I was trying to stuff 2 sausages into 1 sausage container. Now, usually that image would make me sad, but it didn't look that way this time, so I'm very excited!!!! :)
Second, I'm proud of sticking with my Body Flow class (for those of you that don't know, it's a blend of tai chi, yoga & pilates), even though I'm one of the chubbiest girls in there. And I'm proud that I can keep up with the people that have been doing pilates/yoga for much longer than myself. I usually go on Saturday mornings, but since I'm still sick (bummer), I didn't get to go yesterday. Nonetheless, I've been going at least once a week since I started posting about the class in January. And I'm getting pretty good! It's one of the main reasons I aced the flexibility and core strength portions of my fit test, I'm sure.
In fact, I'm proud of sticking with going to the gym in general. January and February are great because I see chubby people at the gym all the time. I want to go up and give them a hug and say, "Good for you!" but I don't, because if someone did that to me I would think they were weird. But it's nice to see other chubby people working to do the same thing I'm working to do. When I'm surrounded by only stick-figure girls or extremely muscular guys, I feel out of place, even though I'm proud of working out at all. Anyway, this weekend, since I was sick, I was actually upset that I couldn't workout. I knew that it was the best decision to help me get better in a hurry, but I miss the endorphins and the routine of working out. I used to HATE the gym - I think the key is finding a program you like and that you believe you can stick to. And try to make your "program" something you can do 3-4 times a week, not just cramming in 3 hours on Sunday as a last ditch effort to lose a pound. 30-45 minutes, 3-4 times a week is better than killing yourself all in one day. And by program, I mean whatever works for you - if that's an hour on the elliptical or 30 minutes of weight training or a class that you like - if you like it, you'll keep doing it. Personally, even stuff I don't love doing, I find it helps me to set a goal. For example, I hate running, but it's always bugged me that I can't run more than 5 feet (it feels like) without gasping for air. So, I set a goal that by the end of April I want to be able to run for 5 minutes straight. I feel like that's something I can be proud of accomplishing, but not something that's out of my reach. Right now I can only run for about 1.5 minutes, but when I started working out, I would only run for a minute. So we're making progress! And I've been increasing my cardio, so hopefully I'll start making some faster progress soon. And with less weight to carry around, my heart won't have to work as hard, either. So, in short - find what works for you!!
Classes at the gym can be intimidating, because you feel like only the "super fit" people go to them. But how do you think those super fit people became fit in the first place? When I'm just at the gym, I can zone out and pray no one is paying attention to me. I don't stare at anyone else, and I hope they all return the same favor. But in my Body Flow class, the room is lined with mirrors. Now ladies (and some gents, but mostly I think ladies have this problem) - those mirrors are not there to make you cringe and leave the class!! They're supposed to be there to help you improve your form and to be able to see the instructor at many different angles. Don't let stuff like that get you down! Classes are a great way to get out of your routine if you're getting bored, work on things you might have been leaving out like flexibility or strength training, or even just to step up the intensity in your cardio. Being a competitive person, I push myself more when I see other people are doing stuff that I find difficult - it makes me work harder, which gives me a better end result. I definitely encourage trying out a couple of classes at your gym if they're included in your membership, but if they don't motivate you or you don't enjoy them, then that's ok! Just make sure you give a couple of classes a chance - don't just take one and give up. :)
As always - THANK YOU!!!
First, I'm proud that yesterday I fit into a skirt that I haven't worn in about 2 years, AND I got 2 compliments that I looked nice. I remember that I bought it in fall of 2007 to wear in one of my Vocal Jazz Forums, and I'm positive I didn't wear it any last year - so 2 years is my best guess. And bonus - it's a size 14!!! Now, I'm not completely a size 14 yet, because I tried on a pair of pants in the same size and they didn't quite button. BUT I'm definitely moving closer, because I remember trying on those same pants last year and it looked liked I was trying to stuff 2 sausages into 1 sausage container. Now, usually that image would make me sad, but it didn't look that way this time, so I'm very excited!!!! :)
Second, I'm proud of sticking with my Body Flow class (for those of you that don't know, it's a blend of tai chi, yoga & pilates), even though I'm one of the chubbiest girls in there. And I'm proud that I can keep up with the people that have been doing pilates/yoga for much longer than myself. I usually go on Saturday mornings, but since I'm still sick (bummer), I didn't get to go yesterday. Nonetheless, I've been going at least once a week since I started posting about the class in January. And I'm getting pretty good! It's one of the main reasons I aced the flexibility and core strength portions of my fit test, I'm sure.
In fact, I'm proud of sticking with going to the gym in general. January and February are great because I see chubby people at the gym all the time. I want to go up and give them a hug and say, "Good for you!" but I don't, because if someone did that to me I would think they were weird. But it's nice to see other chubby people working to do the same thing I'm working to do. When I'm surrounded by only stick-figure girls or extremely muscular guys, I feel out of place, even though I'm proud of working out at all. Anyway, this weekend, since I was sick, I was actually upset that I couldn't workout. I knew that it was the best decision to help me get better in a hurry, but I miss the endorphins and the routine of working out. I used to HATE the gym - I think the key is finding a program you like and that you believe you can stick to. And try to make your "program" something you can do 3-4 times a week, not just cramming in 3 hours on Sunday as a last ditch effort to lose a pound. 30-45 minutes, 3-4 times a week is better than killing yourself all in one day. And by program, I mean whatever works for you - if that's an hour on the elliptical or 30 minutes of weight training or a class that you like - if you like it, you'll keep doing it. Personally, even stuff I don't love doing, I find it helps me to set a goal. For example, I hate running, but it's always bugged me that I can't run more than 5 feet (it feels like) without gasping for air. So, I set a goal that by the end of April I want to be able to run for 5 minutes straight. I feel like that's something I can be proud of accomplishing, but not something that's out of my reach. Right now I can only run for about 1.5 minutes, but when I started working out, I would only run for a minute. So we're making progress! And I've been increasing my cardio, so hopefully I'll start making some faster progress soon. And with less weight to carry around, my heart won't have to work as hard, either. So, in short - find what works for you!!
Classes at the gym can be intimidating, because you feel like only the "super fit" people go to them. But how do you think those super fit people became fit in the first place? When I'm just at the gym, I can zone out and pray no one is paying attention to me. I don't stare at anyone else, and I hope they all return the same favor. But in my Body Flow class, the room is lined with mirrors. Now ladies (and some gents, but mostly I think ladies have this problem) - those mirrors are not there to make you cringe and leave the class!! They're supposed to be there to help you improve your form and to be able to see the instructor at many different angles. Don't let stuff like that get you down! Classes are a great way to get out of your routine if you're getting bored, work on things you might have been leaving out like flexibility or strength training, or even just to step up the intensity in your cardio. Being a competitive person, I push myself more when I see other people are doing stuff that I find difficult - it makes me work harder, which gives me a better end result. I definitely encourage trying out a couple of classes at your gym if they're included in your membership, but if they don't motivate you or you don't enjoy them, then that's ok! Just make sure you give a couple of classes a chance - don't just take one and give up. :)
As always - THANK YOU!!!
Friday, February 19, 2010
A Short Note
Today I'm proud of listening to my body. I've been developing a cold for the past couple of days. Yesterday I felt better, but I didn't have time to go to the gym. Today I was really congested and sneezy. After work (I wasn't sick enough to call in), I felt really achy and tired. So I came home and took a nap instead of working out. It's not worth burning the calories if I'm going to be making myself even sicker. I was still able to make good choices and used a few extra weekly WW points, but not that bad! A girl at work even commented on the fact that I'm always eating healthy food. It was satisfying to know that someone else noticed all my healthy choices.
I'm a little tired and have a sinus headache, so that's all I'm writing for today. But even though I'm sick I'm not giving up! Thanks, as always.
I'm a little tired and have a sinus headache, so that's all I'm writing for today. But even though I'm sick I'm not giving up! Thanks, as always.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
What Honesty Can Do
Today I'm proud of being honest. After years of hiding my body, of hiding the fact that I hate the way I look, I've been able to start changing my life by being honest. And mostly, I'm proud that my honesty has inspired some of my friends to take control of their life, too. My friend Brittany has started a blog very similar to this one. She even joined Weight Watchers because it's been working for me. In her first week, she lost 6 pounds! As if I wasn't happy enough losing weight myself and continuing to stay on plan, I've encouraged and inspired someone I love to do the same. And she is not the only one that has told me they're working towards a healthier self!!
I'm proud that I decided for myself that my life does NOT have to be mediocre - I do not have to be disappointed every time I look in the mirror. I CAN be as happy as I've ever been; I can spend my life at that level of satisfaction with myself. Bad things happen in life, of course, and that stuff is completely out of my hands. But the person that I am, the person I'm becoming - that IS in my hands. I'm proud that I've realized all this, and I'm proud that I've helped people I care about very much realize it.
Interestingly, the more I work on my health and my weight, the more I see my personality improving. I'm more of the person I hope to be one day. I'm a generally happier and more productive person. I don't snap at people as easily, I don't get as aggravated or angry at little things. I guess for me, the happier I am with myself, the happier I am for other people and all their accomplishments. The easier it is for me to be 100% happy for them, instead of like 5% jealous and 95% happy. I'm not saying that overweight people are selfish. But I know that sometimes there was a voice in the back of my head reminding me that I was unhappy. If someone got new clothes, I would think, "I'll never look that good in that outfit." Or if someone ate unhealthy food, I would think, "How come they can eat that and stay thin and I can't?" Living as an unhappy overweight person is exhausting - it feels like acting all the time. Acting like I'm happy, like I'm confident, like I feel like I belong in a group of all my gorgeous friends. But lately, I've been actually FEELING the way that I've been acting like I feel for years. I know I'm not at the finish line, but I'm feeling great about how far I've already come. Maybe it's that I can feel my clothes getting loser, or maybe it's all the endorphins from the gym - but whatever it is, I like it!
Please ask if you'd like the link to my friend Brittany's blog - I hope we can help her feel the same support I feel!
I'm proud that I decided for myself that my life does NOT have to be mediocre - I do not have to be disappointed every time I look in the mirror. I CAN be as happy as I've ever been; I can spend my life at that level of satisfaction with myself. Bad things happen in life, of course, and that stuff is completely out of my hands. But the person that I am, the person I'm becoming - that IS in my hands. I'm proud that I've realized all this, and I'm proud that I've helped people I care about very much realize it.
Interestingly, the more I work on my health and my weight, the more I see my personality improving. I'm more of the person I hope to be one day. I'm a generally happier and more productive person. I don't snap at people as easily, I don't get as aggravated or angry at little things. I guess for me, the happier I am with myself, the happier I am for other people and all their accomplishments. The easier it is for me to be 100% happy for them, instead of like 5% jealous and 95% happy. I'm not saying that overweight people are selfish. But I know that sometimes there was a voice in the back of my head reminding me that I was unhappy. If someone got new clothes, I would think, "I'll never look that good in that outfit." Or if someone ate unhealthy food, I would think, "How come they can eat that and stay thin and I can't?" Living as an unhappy overweight person is exhausting - it feels like acting all the time. Acting like I'm happy, like I'm confident, like I feel like I belong in a group of all my gorgeous friends. But lately, I've been actually FEELING the way that I've been acting like I feel for years. I know I'm not at the finish line, but I'm feeling great about how far I've already come. Maybe it's that I can feel my clothes getting loser, or maybe it's all the endorphins from the gym - but whatever it is, I like it!
Please ask if you'd like the link to my friend Brittany's blog - I hope we can help her feel the same support I feel!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Weigh-in day 6!
This week was my kind-of week off. And I managed to lost 1/2 a pound! I'm now at 209.3. I didn't track my points after Friday, and I only worked out 2 days this week. But I managed to lose a little!! Mostly I'm proud that I didn't gain.
This week I've decided to post one thing every day that I'm proud of accomplishing. Not something I'm proud of about myself that comes naturally (like, musucular legs, or my eyes), but of something I've done. It could be something as small as turning down french fries, or something bigger like reaching a workout goal. Today - I'm proud that I could still make decent food decisions this week, even though I wasn't counting my points. I mentioned in my last post that fast food doesn't sound good to me anymore. But it's not just that - I'm more aware of my portion sizes, and I can tell that my stomach has started shrinking. What wouldn't fill me up before, makes me satisfied now. Or perhaps it's just that I don't eat until I feel like I'm exploding. Either way. Even when I eat fattening/bad for me food, I eat it in a smarter way. I don't let myself just eat out of boredom or habit. I pay attention to WHY I'm eating, which is a big issue for me. So I'm proud that in just 2 months I've changed my unhealthy eating habits almost completely.
I'm a firm believer in "you can eat whatever you want in moderation," although I think many people use it as an excuse. To an extent, it's true - if you're working out regularly and dieting, then it's even more true. If you watch your portion sizes and allot for the extra calories in your diet plan, then yes, you can eat almost anything! I can't say this enough - you CANNOT restrict yourself from all "bad" foods - your diet plan will fail. Unless you have much conviction and self-control than I do! I do a mental check before I decide to eat something unhealthy - how many points do I have left for the day? Am I hungry? Do I really want to eat it? I make myself think before I eat. Again, it's one decision at a time!!
And as always - thank you!
This week I've decided to post one thing every day that I'm proud of accomplishing. Not something I'm proud of about myself that comes naturally (like, musucular legs, or my eyes), but of something I've done. It could be something as small as turning down french fries, or something bigger like reaching a workout goal. Today - I'm proud that I could still make decent food decisions this week, even though I wasn't counting my points. I mentioned in my last post that fast food doesn't sound good to me anymore. But it's not just that - I'm more aware of my portion sizes, and I can tell that my stomach has started shrinking. What wouldn't fill me up before, makes me satisfied now. Or perhaps it's just that I don't eat until I feel like I'm exploding. Either way. Even when I eat fattening/bad for me food, I eat it in a smarter way. I don't let myself just eat out of boredom or habit. I pay attention to WHY I'm eating, which is a big issue for me. So I'm proud that in just 2 months I've changed my unhealthy eating habits almost completely.
I'm a firm believer in "you can eat whatever you want in moderation," although I think many people use it as an excuse. To an extent, it's true - if you're working out regularly and dieting, then it's even more true. If you watch your portion sizes and allot for the extra calories in your diet plan, then yes, you can eat almost anything! I can't say this enough - you CANNOT restrict yourself from all "bad" foods - your diet plan will fail. Unless you have much conviction and self-control than I do! I do a mental check before I decide to eat something unhealthy - how many points do I have left for the day? Am I hungry? Do I really want to eat it? I make myself think before I eat. Again, it's one decision at a time!!
And as always - thank you!
Monday, February 15, 2010
A Temporary Break
This week kicked my butt. When I wasn't running my butt off, I was exhausted. I often didn't have time to get to my computer to log my WW points. So, around Saturday, I decided to make this a week off. I didn't make horrible decisions, but I certainly didn't follow the diet like I usually would have.
Interestingly, I discovered something. I was thinking about picking up fast food on Saturday on the way home from a gig. Now, the old Danielle would have had no problem going through the McDonald's drive through and ordering the double quarter pound with cheese and a large fry. But no matter what fast food place I thought of, nothing sounded good enough for me to waste that many calories on. it was the most bizarre feeling - I can't say I've ever not wanted fattening food. It wasn't even guilt really that kept me away, just a feeling of it not being worth it. Who knew almost 2 months on a diet could change you that much? I ended up going to Chili's and getting a house salad and chips and salsa. (I'm not calling myself a saint - I ate about half of that bag of chips.)
I'll be interested to see what happens on Wednesday when I weigh-in. I'm expecting either to maintain or gain around a pound. I'm doing my best to not look at this as a step back, but instead as a well-deserved (and needed, for the sake of my sanity) break. Even if I gain, which will be sad, you get what you work for. And I just didn't have the time or energy to put in the work this week. So, not every week is a success. We'll see.
Interestingly, I discovered something. I was thinking about picking up fast food on Saturday on the way home from a gig. Now, the old Danielle would have had no problem going through the McDonald's drive through and ordering the double quarter pound with cheese and a large fry. But no matter what fast food place I thought of, nothing sounded good enough for me to waste that many calories on. it was the most bizarre feeling - I can't say I've ever not wanted fattening food. It wasn't even guilt really that kept me away, just a feeling of it not being worth it. Who knew almost 2 months on a diet could change you that much? I ended up going to Chili's and getting a house salad and chips and salsa. (I'm not calling myself a saint - I ate about half of that bag of chips.)
I'll be interested to see what happens on Wednesday when I weigh-in. I'm expecting either to maintain or gain around a pound. I'm doing my best to not look at this as a step back, but instead as a well-deserved (and needed, for the sake of my sanity) break. Even if I gain, which will be sad, you get what you work for. And I just didn't have the time or energy to put in the work this week. So, not every week is a success. We'll see.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Weigh-in day 5!
So, this week my normal weigh-in day was a little thrown off. Yesterday, I went to Nashville to go see John Mayer, and I had to leave right after work. So, I weighed myself on Tuesday and Thursday and took the average of the weight loss which means . . . . . 209.8! 1.5 pounds down!! AND under 210! People have started noticing that I look thinner and complimenting me. It always feels great to hear that. I know that my clothes have been fitting better and I'm starting to wear stuff I never would have 3 months ago. I still have lots of clothes in my closet that don't quite fit, but it's certainly getting better.
This week might be a little tricky - it's my "female" week. I've been losing steadily since I started this blog, so if this week isn't the greatest then that's ok. I mean, obviously I want to keep losing, but if there's going to be a week of the month that I lose less than others, this is it.
I want to clear something up about the pictures I posted. My very fantastic friend Brittany said she hopes to have my confidence. And while I intensely appreciate her (and everyone's!) support, I am NOWHERE NEAR happy with my body. And any confidence I have is just because I'm down 19 pounds, not because I'm actually confident with the way I look now. I posted those pictures because I'm tired of hiding, of only buying clothes that I know will hide my body. I'm tired of going shopping with my friends and only buying hats and jewelry because I don't want to see how I look in the clothes they look fantastic in. So I may be brave (although that's not the word I would use), but confidence in body is not something I have yet. That's what I'm working on! What I can say is that I'm proud. I'm proud of going to the gym as often as I have been, and of continuing to make good choices.
An old roommate of mine used to have a motto posted on our fridge - Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. Now, this is all well and good most of the time, until you eat an entire carton of mint chocolate chip ice cream. I actually think nothing tastes as good as the feeling of pride you have when you're making the right choices, or after you leave the gym. Which, ironically, can allow you to have a couple bites of ice cream.
This week might be a little tricky - it's my "female" week. I've been losing steadily since I started this blog, so if this week isn't the greatest then that's ok. I mean, obviously I want to keep losing, but if there's going to be a week of the month that I lose less than others, this is it.
I want to clear something up about the pictures I posted. My very fantastic friend Brittany said she hopes to have my confidence. And while I intensely appreciate her (and everyone's!) support, I am NOWHERE NEAR happy with my body. And any confidence I have is just because I'm down 19 pounds, not because I'm actually confident with the way I look now. I posted those pictures because I'm tired of hiding, of only buying clothes that I know will hide my body. I'm tired of going shopping with my friends and only buying hats and jewelry because I don't want to see how I look in the clothes they look fantastic in. So I may be brave (although that's not the word I would use), but confidence in body is not something I have yet. That's what I'm working on! What I can say is that I'm proud. I'm proud of going to the gym as often as I have been, and of continuing to make good choices.
An old roommate of mine used to have a motto posted on our fridge - Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. Now, this is all well and good most of the time, until you eat an entire carton of mint chocolate chip ice cream. I actually think nothing tastes as good as the feeling of pride you have when you're making the right choices, or after you leave the gym. Which, ironically, can allow you to have a couple bites of ice cream.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
One More Thing . . .
Almost forgot! In honor of The Biggest Loser, if you are planning on losing weight this year, PLEASE go to www.pfpchallenge.com and pledge your planned weight loss!!! It's FREE, and for every pound pledged, a pound of food is donated to your local food bank. Last week I pledged to lose 50 pounds this year.
This is a great cause, promoting a healthy lifestyle for all Americans, whether that means eating less or making sure there's enough food on the table to feed your family. 4,018,678 pounds have been pledged so far. Especially in this recession, this is much needed food for people all over the country. 1 in 8 Americans are affected by hunger, and many of them are children who need food to help them succeed in school and break the hunger cycle in their family. Many of you know that my mom is the director of Knoxville's food bank, Second Harvest Food Bank of East Tennessee, which is part of the parent organization Feeding America. She works everyday to counteract the hunger epidemic in 18 counties in East Tennessee. 1 in 6 East Tennesseans deal with hunger everyday, or 245, 006 people. This is not just a problem in 3rd world countries - it happens RIGHT HERE in America. And you can do something about it - without having to pay a dime! Even if you're only planning to lose 10 pounds - that's 10 pounds of food on a family's table.
Right now Tennessee is in 15th place in the US with pounds pledged, and Texas is in 2nd place!! Texas is one of the fattest states in the country - so go Texans!! No matter what state you are in - every pound counts!! So go and pledge to take that weight off!
This is a great cause, promoting a healthy lifestyle for all Americans, whether that means eating less or making sure there's enough food on the table to feed your family. 4,018,678 pounds have been pledged so far. Especially in this recession, this is much needed food for people all over the country. 1 in 8 Americans are affected by hunger, and many of them are children who need food to help them succeed in school and break the hunger cycle in their family. Many of you know that my mom is the director of Knoxville's food bank, Second Harvest Food Bank of East Tennessee, which is part of the parent organization Feeding America. She works everyday to counteract the hunger epidemic in 18 counties in East Tennessee. 1 in 6 East Tennesseans deal with hunger everyday, or 245, 006 people. This is not just a problem in 3rd world countries - it happens RIGHT HERE in America. And you can do something about it - without having to pay a dime! Even if you're only planning to lose 10 pounds - that's 10 pounds of food on a family's table.
Right now Tennessee is in 15th place in the US with pounds pledged, and Texas is in 2nd place!! Texas is one of the fattest states in the country - so go Texans!! No matter what state you are in - every pound counts!! So go and pledge to take that weight off!
Training and Accountability
Hello all! Today's Tuesday, which is usually pretty busy for me, but has cleared out a little this week. So I have plenty of time to go to the gym today - which I plan to do in about an hour! I'm going to put in a little cardio before my Body Flow class. Just wanted to make a quick post beforehand.
Yesterday, I mentioned that I worked with a trainer on some arm and leg strength training exercises. They gave me 3 quick and easy exercises that get all major muscle groups in both my arms and legs. It takes about 10 minutes. Strength training isn't my forte - I'm great at getting cardio in, but I hate taking time to do 15 exercises on 15 different machines. I want to be toned, but it's not what I enjoy working on. I had someone set up a program like that for me once, and I just couldn't stick to it. It took too much time and it's SO boring to me. So this time I asked for a simple, quick program that I could add to later if I felt like I could handle it. My gym was very accomodating. (By the way, both the fit test and the setting up of this program are included in the membership costs. Ask the people who work at your gym if something like this is included for you! Great way to get around having to pay for a personal trainer!) For legs, they have me doing leg presses (like squats but pushing weight away from you with your legs instead of pushing your body up), 2 sets of 12 with 90 lbs. of weight. For arms I have 2 exercises - one is a downward row (pulling weight down and towards me in a rowing motion instead of just straight back towards me), and the other is like a chest press where my arms are straight out and I pull them in, palms together. Both exercises I do 2 sets of 12 with 8 pounds each arm on the rowing, and 4 pounds each arm on the chest press. Between the 2 of these, they get my triceps (back of arm), biceps, chest and back/shoulder muscles. I didn't need any ab exercises since I'm doing abs in my Body Flow class and crunches on my own. So everything's covered!
My mom asked me the other day why I think the diet is working this time when it didn't work so many times before. I told her it's probably a couple of reasons, one being that I moved away from college and am living a generally more healthy lifestyle now. I'm much less stressed out now that I'm not in school and working at the same time. But mostly, I'm really being honest with myself about what I'm eating. I used to say "I don't feel like counting my points today I PROBABLY stayed in my daily points," or "Oh, I'm eating a salad, so it's PROBABLY okay that I have 4 dinner rolls with butter," or "Man, that french onion dip looks good, it's PROBABLY low fat, right?" This all continued until my size 18 pants starting getting tight, or my jeans would wear out in 3 months because I wore a hole through the material between my thighs so quickly. So now, I may still let myself have that french onion dip, but I make sure to enter it into my points tracker (WW online program that counts all your points for you if you enter in the right food). I make sure to enter my points in every day, even if I really don't feel like it. And I hold myself to one roll instead of 4. I'm not restricting myself from foods I like completely - I've just adjusted how often I eat them and how much of them I eat. The other day I had a fun size 3 Musketeers bar. (And by the way, I think the name "fun size" for candy bars is complete crap. Because true fun size would be about 5 times the size of what "fun size" is. They should call it "smart size" instead. Just a thought.) So, morale of the day - find a workout that works for you, and learn to hold yourself accountable!! No one else is going to do it for you! People are always around to support you and help you - but when it comes down to it, YOU are the only person that can pry the chocolate chip cookie dough out of your hands at 1:30am!!!
Thanks to you all for being my support and help!
Yesterday, I mentioned that I worked with a trainer on some arm and leg strength training exercises. They gave me 3 quick and easy exercises that get all major muscle groups in both my arms and legs. It takes about 10 minutes. Strength training isn't my forte - I'm great at getting cardio in, but I hate taking time to do 15 exercises on 15 different machines. I want to be toned, but it's not what I enjoy working on. I had someone set up a program like that for me once, and I just couldn't stick to it. It took too much time and it's SO boring to me. So this time I asked for a simple, quick program that I could add to later if I felt like I could handle it. My gym was very accomodating. (By the way, both the fit test and the setting up of this program are included in the membership costs. Ask the people who work at your gym if something like this is included for you! Great way to get around having to pay for a personal trainer!) For legs, they have me doing leg presses (like squats but pushing weight away from you with your legs instead of pushing your body up), 2 sets of 12 with 90 lbs. of weight. For arms I have 2 exercises - one is a downward row (pulling weight down and towards me in a rowing motion instead of just straight back towards me), and the other is like a chest press where my arms are straight out and I pull them in, palms together. Both exercises I do 2 sets of 12 with 8 pounds each arm on the rowing, and 4 pounds each arm on the chest press. Between the 2 of these, they get my triceps (back of arm), biceps, chest and back/shoulder muscles. I didn't need any ab exercises since I'm doing abs in my Body Flow class and crunches on my own. So everything's covered!
My mom asked me the other day why I think the diet is working this time when it didn't work so many times before. I told her it's probably a couple of reasons, one being that I moved away from college and am living a generally more healthy lifestyle now. I'm much less stressed out now that I'm not in school and working at the same time. But mostly, I'm really being honest with myself about what I'm eating. I used to say "I don't feel like counting my points today I PROBABLY stayed in my daily points," or "Oh, I'm eating a salad, so it's PROBABLY okay that I have 4 dinner rolls with butter," or "Man, that french onion dip looks good, it's PROBABLY low fat, right?" This all continued until my size 18 pants starting getting tight, or my jeans would wear out in 3 months because I wore a hole through the material between my thighs so quickly. So now, I may still let myself have that french onion dip, but I make sure to enter it into my points tracker (WW online program that counts all your points for you if you enter in the right food). I make sure to enter my points in every day, even if I really don't feel like it. And I hold myself to one roll instead of 4. I'm not restricting myself from foods I like completely - I've just adjusted how often I eat them and how much of them I eat. The other day I had a fun size 3 Musketeers bar. (And by the way, I think the name "fun size" for candy bars is complete crap. Because true fun size would be about 5 times the size of what "fun size" is. They should call it "smart size" instead. Just a thought.) So, morale of the day - find a workout that works for you, and learn to hold yourself accountable!! No one else is going to do it for you! People are always around to support you and help you - but when it comes down to it, YOU are the only person that can pry the chocolate chip cookie dough out of your hands at 1:30am!!!
Thanks to you all for being my support and help!
Monday, February 8, 2010
Fit Test
In the interest of honesty, I've posted these pictures. I want something to compare when I've reached my goal weight. Let me say that I haven't worn those shorts in public since probably 11th grade. I usually try to find an excuse NOT to go to the beach or a pool or really anywhere where I know there's going to be a lot of people and I'm going to be wearing about this much clothing. And this is 17 pounts down. So even though they are very difficult to post, this blog is about honesty. What's more honest than photos?
And on that note, the results of my fit test. I'll give you all the stats first.
VO2 max (maximal oxygen consumption) - 32.83 (below average)
Body Mass Index (weight vs. height) - 34.70 (Grade 1 Obesity)
Blood Pressure - 114/72 (Optimal)
Body Fat % - 37.90% (Well below average)
Waist to Hit Ratio - .82 (barely average)
Flexibility - 19.6 inches (average)
Upper body strength - 15 pushups (well below average)
Core body strength - 70 crunches (well above average)
Okay, so some explanation of what all that crap means.
The VO2 max is the maximal rate at which oxygen can be taken up and used by muscles during physical activity. Basically, it depends on how efficient your heart, lungs and musculoskeletal system can work. It's a measurement of Cardiorespiratory Endurance (CRE), which is the to ability work out at moderate to high intensity for extended periods of time. The higher your CRE, the higher your VO2 max. Why does all this matter? People with low VO2 max are at a greater risk for early death from cardiovascular disease. Now, mine is 32.83. Average, for my age, is 35.2-38.0. My level is average for women 40-49. That was an eye-opening number. I'd hate to know what it was before I started working out regularly. But I look forward to see how fast the number goes up - I'll have another one of these in 3 months I think. The girl that did my fit test said it's very possible at my age to get to the "well above average" level, which is 44.1 and up because I'm young. But at this point I'd be happy with average.
Body Mass Index is pretty self explanatory - weight relative to height. Average for women is between 18.5-24.9 kg/m2. I'm .2 away from being at Grade 2 Obesity, which comes right before Morbid Obesity. So I'm sure glad I'm heading the opposite direction at the moment.
Blood Pressure - everyone knows this is important. Mine is good! Hooray!
Body Fat Percentage - this is the women's scary area. Now, according to the paper I received with all this information on it, I'm considered "well below average." "Average" is between 19.1-22.1%. The girl that gave me the test, however, told me that 32 % or less is healthy, 20-25% is fitness level and less than 20% is athlete level. So, I'd really like to be 25-27%. We'll see how that goes!
Waist to Hip Ratio - this is a valuable way to measure changes in body composition. It measures overall distribution of fat. If fat is stored in the abdominal region, you're at higher risk for developing hypertension, Type II diabetes and heart disease. I'm just barely average - which means I probably was high risk 17 pounds ago. But again - headed in the right direction!
Flexibility is important because it can prevent injury. I'm on my way to being above average - the Body Flow class I'm taking is a big help.
Upper body strength - this is always women's weakness. Average is between 26-31 pushups, so that's my goal. Today I worked with a trainer to get a couple of arm exercises that can help me reach this goal.
Core body strength - I ROCKED this section. In fact, I maxed out the test. Heck yeah - doing abs everyday that I'm at the gym is paying off!!
I took this same test in 2005, when I weighed around 190. Just for comparisons sake, here are my results from then. The test has changed a bit, so they didn't measure my VO2 max, but here's everything else.
Body Mass Index - 31
Blood Pressure - 102/60
Body Fat Percentage - 29%
Waist to Hip Ratio - .84
Flexibility - 15.7 in
Upper body strength - 17 pushups
Core body strength - 56 crunches
My waist to hip ratio is actually lower now than it was, even though I weigh more now. I'm going to guess that this is due to my intense ab work lately. Or perhaps I gained more weight around my hips this time than last time. Let's hope for the former. My flexibility is better now (thanks to the Body Flow class and my diligent stretching), as is my core body strength. I don't think my upper body strength is actually worse - I just have more weight to push up now.
In other news, I think things are going well! I went to a small superbowl gathering and managed to stay within my weekly points. I've eaten out a couple more times this week than last week, and I may have underestimated the points on some items. And I didn't go to the gym Saturday, even though I had plenty of time to. Friday I usually have time to go, but I had a gig so I couldn't. Anyway, if I work out tomorrow I will have only worked out 4 days this week. I guess I'll see how it all turns out on weigh-in day! Lastly, at the fit test, the girl said I should do 45-60 minutes of cardio 5-6 days a week. I should be doing strength training 2-3 times a week. I think these are possible most weeks. I also set 3 goals for myself to reach in 3 months:
1) run for 5 minutes straight
2) reach 190 pounds
3) fit into the size 12 clothes I already have in my closet!
As always, thank you for supporting me and continuing to read!
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Weigh-in day 4
211.3!!!!!! YES! YEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!! Ladies and gents, that's 2.5 pounds down from last week, 17.1 pounds down since I moved back to Tennessee, and 9.2 pounds down since I started seriously sticking to this diet about the beginning of December! Weight Watchers informed me that I've lost 5% of my body weight. That's also one solid week away from being under 210, and only a few weeks away from being under 200! My current goal is to be under 200 by the end of March - this is a very achievable goal if I stick to what I'm already doing.
My fit test has been rescheduled for tomorrow - I'll let you all know how that goes! This is all I have time to write now - I'll update you again soon!
My fit test has been rescheduled for tomorrow - I'll let you all know how that goes! This is all I have time to write now - I'll update you again soon!
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Still Chugging Along
Hello again! Sorry for being crappy at blogging this week. I have 2 excuses - #1 it's been a crazy week with snow and going out of town for a gig, #2 I've been lazy. :) First - at my weigh-in last week I only lost 0.3 pounds. Or pound. I'd been working out really hard and felt like I was making good food decisions, so it was kind of a slap in the face. I think it might have been influenced by 2 factors - I overestimated my daily activity level (how many calories you burn from day to day), or I'm overestimating my portion sizes on things like . . . chips. I can burn through a bag of chips no problem. So, to counteract, this week I changed my daily points back to 28, when a couple weeks ago I upped it to 30 because I thought I'd be burning a few more calories at the restaurant. And I've tried to keep a better eye on how many chips I've been eating. Although my hope is that by lowering my daily points value, it will even itself out and allow me to lose more weight this week. We'll see tomorrow!
But I'm still dieting away! The snow this weekend left me homebound and threw off my workout schedule. I had a fit test scheduled for Saturday, but being that the roads were a bit icy I had to miss it. And since then I've just been lazy and unmotivated. Even though I've stuck to my points this week, I've been feeling kind of down about the whole diet situation. Maybe it's because I haven't had the high endorphins (I just had to spell check that, just so everyone knows) of working out, or maybe it's because I basically sat around all day Friday and Saturday since the city of Knoxville completely shut down. Either way I've just been feeling sort of bummed out. Even though I've made good choices, I've felt guilty. It's very bizarre.
Last night we went out for my stepdad's birthday to this fantastic pizza place (Big Ed's, for you Knoxvillians). ALL they serve is pizza. Well, and beer. Great combination for people on a diet. But I limited myself to 2 1/2 small pieces of plain cheese pizza, and 2 glasses of Michelob Ultra, which is almost the lightest beer you can get. And when we got home, I didn't have a piece of cake. But I was just sitting there watching all my family eating and drinking as much as they wanted, and it really frustrated me. My sister's always been naturally thinner than me (though not to discount her work ethic - she is better at going to the gym than I am, too), and my mom works out like a fiend so she's always been slim for her frame. Now, the rest of the table was full of boys, who can basically eat 3000 calories a day, and then lose 10 pounds in a week if they want to. So I'm not even going to go into how unfair THAT is. But just watching the women in my family, I started to feel guilty that I let myself get to this point. That I, somehow, was dealt the unfair gene which causes me to adore delicious but horrible-for-you foods and not really enjoy working out. That I got the short end of the stick, and didn't handle it well. And ended up the fat one. And this isn't limited to family members. I sang at a concert Sunday night and couldn't help thinking the same thing about all the other girls my age. I couldn't let a song go by without taking a second to think, "God, I wish I looked like her. What's wrong with me?" And usually music can carry me away to a place where things like weight or social status don't exist. But the diet and weight thing has been such a huge part of my life lately, that it seems to be on my mind constantly. Which can be frustrating. Some days I just want to have french fries without having to weigh out the pros and cons of eating them. Do I have time to go to the gym today? How many of my weekly points am I willing to spend? Goodness, that cupcake looks delicious. I wonder how many points it is . . . and so it continues, every hour of the day.
I've been on a diet enough times in my life to know that it has significant ups and downs. Some weeks I feel great, and only lose .5 pound(s), and some weeks I feel like I didn't do well and lose 2. But it sure would be nice if I could continue to feel great and motivated, even if I'm not losing as much weight as I'd like per week. There's a big difference between dieting while being happy about it and dieting while you dread the approach of every meal because you know that you're not going to eat what you'd really like to eat. Writing this helps - it's one of the reasons that I started blogging. I can say that I'm proud of myself this week for sticking to the diet even though I've felt icky and haven't been able to work out much. I am going to the gym tonight - it's Body Flow class day! That class always makes me feel better. Even though almost all the people in there are thinner than me, I'm totally keeping up with them. See? My competitive nature is good for something!!!
Thanks for stopping by and always holding me accountable! And a special thank you to people who ask me how the diet's going when I haven't posted in awhile!
But I'm still dieting away! The snow this weekend left me homebound and threw off my workout schedule. I had a fit test scheduled for Saturday, but being that the roads were a bit icy I had to miss it. And since then I've just been lazy and unmotivated. Even though I've stuck to my points this week, I've been feeling kind of down about the whole diet situation. Maybe it's because I haven't had the high endorphins (I just had to spell check that, just so everyone knows) of working out, or maybe it's because I basically sat around all day Friday and Saturday since the city of Knoxville completely shut down. Either way I've just been feeling sort of bummed out. Even though I've made good choices, I've felt guilty. It's very bizarre.
Last night we went out for my stepdad's birthday to this fantastic pizza place (Big Ed's, for you Knoxvillians). ALL they serve is pizza. Well, and beer. Great combination for people on a diet. But I limited myself to 2 1/2 small pieces of plain cheese pizza, and 2 glasses of Michelob Ultra, which is almost the lightest beer you can get. And when we got home, I didn't have a piece of cake. But I was just sitting there watching all my family eating and drinking as much as they wanted, and it really frustrated me. My sister's always been naturally thinner than me (though not to discount her work ethic - she is better at going to the gym than I am, too), and my mom works out like a fiend so she's always been slim for her frame. Now, the rest of the table was full of boys, who can basically eat 3000 calories a day, and then lose 10 pounds in a week if they want to. So I'm not even going to go into how unfair THAT is. But just watching the women in my family, I started to feel guilty that I let myself get to this point. That I, somehow, was dealt the unfair gene which causes me to adore delicious but horrible-for-you foods and not really enjoy working out. That I got the short end of the stick, and didn't handle it well. And ended up the fat one. And this isn't limited to family members. I sang at a concert Sunday night and couldn't help thinking the same thing about all the other girls my age. I couldn't let a song go by without taking a second to think, "God, I wish I looked like her. What's wrong with me?" And usually music can carry me away to a place where things like weight or social status don't exist. But the diet and weight thing has been such a huge part of my life lately, that it seems to be on my mind constantly. Which can be frustrating. Some days I just want to have french fries without having to weigh out the pros and cons of eating them. Do I have time to go to the gym today? How many of my weekly points am I willing to spend? Goodness, that cupcake looks delicious. I wonder how many points it is . . . and so it continues, every hour of the day.
I've been on a diet enough times in my life to know that it has significant ups and downs. Some weeks I feel great, and only lose .5 pound(s), and some weeks I feel like I didn't do well and lose 2. But it sure would be nice if I could continue to feel great and motivated, even if I'm not losing as much weight as I'd like per week. There's a big difference between dieting while being happy about it and dieting while you dread the approach of every meal because you know that you're not going to eat what you'd really like to eat. Writing this helps - it's one of the reasons that I started blogging. I can say that I'm proud of myself this week for sticking to the diet even though I've felt icky and haven't been able to work out much. I am going to the gym tonight - it's Body Flow class day! That class always makes me feel better. Even though almost all the people in there are thinner than me, I'm totally keeping up with them. See? My competitive nature is good for something!!!
Thanks for stopping by and always holding me accountable! And a special thank you to people who ask me how the diet's going when I haven't posted in awhile!
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